To The Fullest.

24 Oct

If there was a Bible verse that could best describe my time as a youth group leader, it would be John 10:10.

“The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy, I came that they may have life, and have it abundantly.”

John 10:10 NASB

I cannot tell you how many times I have heard that verse from the kids and Shane…or even how often it comes up in my own life.

“You only live once, right?” – was the phrase of a trip I went on with my friends Memorial Weekend.

How true it is! When you actually live life and not let it pass you by, life is full. Meaningful. Yet for a variety of reasons, we are often unable to enjoy this current time of life. Whether it be due to a trial or because we are waiting for something “greater”……………

So often I just sit back and think about how amazing my mission trip to Joplin was. I got back 45 days ago, but I am still on such a high from it. I am just so…so, flabbergasted, by God’s faithfulness on the trip and the time thereafter.

But with such high’s in our faith, the enemy is defeated and wants to get us back in his web. And that my friends, is what i find myself on the brink of today. After I got back, I had a good thing going. In the morning, I would wake up to a email devo from Greg Laurie. I even got myself on the habit of reading 3 Psalms a day as we did in Joplin (and woke up 30+ minutes earlier to do so.) On my way to work I listened to Allistair Begg. At work I would listen to Christian music. In the night time I would do another devo.

My days were full of Jesus…and I enjoyed it!

But then one thing lead to another and I stopped doing the Psalms thing as frequent…maybe two or three times a week in the afternoon. I would still wake up earlier, but those minutes were idle minutes. I also stopped giving Him my whole heart, just little pieces of it because life got “too busy”. That’s the hard part about being immature in our faith, we think busyness is a reason to not give Jesus our full heart and mind. It’s a very pathetic excuse…and I know it!

Excuses and manipulation are two things I am wonderfully successful at. I have excuses at the tip of my tongue for nearly every situation. Why didn’t i read my Bible? Well, I was tired. I fell asleep. I read half of it and then my friend texted me. I left my Bible in my car. I left my Bible at my sisters house. I’m sick. A customer came in. I had a horrible headache and couldn’t focus. I started reading and then got invited to do something and then I forgot – I was going to finish it later.

Manipulation? I don’t want to go into detail how pathetic I could be.

The awesome thing is that even though I am not giving Him my whole heart – He is still faithful to me…and His faithfulness is breaking my heart because my faithfulness is so not there. How thankful I am for His Spirit of conviction in me.

He continues to make me realize that I live a wonderful life. A life definitely not free from trials – rather trials upon trials. And the older I get, the more I depend on Him. The more I let go and let God. My life is awesome.

Whilst in Joplin, Shane told our group, “THIS is life.”

And that has stuck with me since. THIS is life…to live it abundantly. As His hands and feet.

So as He continues to make me realize that I am completely blessed through awesome friends, family, and memories…I will continue to do what I know I need to do. And to do it with all my heart, mind, and soul.

Lord, i give You my heart
i give You my soul
i live for You alone
Every breath that i take
Every moment i’m awake
Lord, have Your way in me.

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One Response to “To The Fullest.”

  1. Funmilayo I. 2011 October 29 at 4:49 pm #

    I love that song and that verse … and I’m working on the Bible reading too

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