Savoring this Heart that’s Healed.

7 Oct

A couple days ago I was listening to my iPod on shuffle whilst driving and a song by The Ember Days called Holding On came on. The next song to play was Hold On by Shawn McDonald.

Now, I’m not one to think so deeply about random occurrences such as this, BUT I do know God can use all sorts of ways to speak to us…even if it is through random songs on my iPod. So with that being said, I had a twinge of a feeling God was trying to get my attention.

It just so happened to slip my mind that my pastor covered an amazing verse about holding on, or rather, holding fast, just this last Sunday in our study of Hebrews 10.

“Let us hold fast the confession of our hope without wavering, for He who promised is faithful.” 

Hebrews 10:23

I also wrote a short blog a couple months ago about one of my favorite poem’s I found in a book as a child.

Hold fast to dreams

for if dreams die

life is a broken-winged bird

that cannot fly.

Hold fast to dreams

for if dreams go

life is a barren field

frozen with snow.

-Langston Hughes

On Thursday nights, the college group (aka The Gathering) gather together for fellowship, coffee, worship, Jesus, and prayer. We usually cover and dig into what scripture our pastor spoke on Sunday, and that’s exactly what we did this week…and I realized why He played those songs on my iPod and why the topic of holding fast came up so often.

It’s because I held on.

I keep holding on.

I can’t see Him. I can’t hear Him. I can’t feel Him. But I’ve had faith in Him even when it would have been so easy to let go during this last painful trial. All He wanted me to do was trust Him, He knew what was going on…even if nothing made sense and His motives seemed so mean. He wanted me to trust. And I did.

It was mentioned last night that even if what brings us to the point of having to hold on and have faith in Christ during a hard time, once the trial is over, we can feel encouraged in Him because we held on to Him until the end of said trial. Whether it be a big or little thing.

By the way, have you ever looked up the definition of encouraged?

Let me do it for you.

Encouraged – To stimulate spiritually.

I like that.

So yeah, I realized that God wants me to delight in this accomplishment. Righteous pride. That even when I was so confused, hurt, and heartbroken…He was still and is faithful. My faith didn’t waver, I didn’t doubt. I had indecision, but no doubt. Because of God’s faithfulness in the past, I had trust and faith He would still and always be faithful.

I’m still so confused about the trial that hit 2 years ago…so, so, confused. But He has and will continue to use my testimony resulting from it to give Him glory. And I am so delighted He would use me in that way.

I have one more thing to share, some more lyrics. This one is a Flyleaf song (David Crowder did a cover).

Take my hand
I give it to You
Now You own me
All I am
You said You would never leave me
I believe You
I believe

I can feel You all around me
Thickening the air I’m breathing
Holding on to what I’m feeling
Savoring this heart that’s healed 

I am savoring this heart that’s healed. After 2 years, I am so thankful. He is faithful always. Always, always, always.

Thank You, Jesus.


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