Endurance

1 Feb

Those who know me well, know that my favorite book of the Bible is…?

 

James, of course!

I cannot tell you HOW many times James 1:2-5 has given me strength to look to the Lord and give Him the joy in the midst of trials. In the testing of my faith.

In the four or five weeks my church has offered Sunday night discipleship groups, my faith has been greatly tested. James 1:2 tells us to consider it ALL joy when our faith is being tested. When we are tested – perseverance, patience, endurance is produced. We become perfect and complete. And with joy, we allow the Lord to do His good work in us and those around us.

Right now, there are 3 specific areas in which I find myself fighting anxiety and seeking out joy in faith the Lord will provide.

1) My car is dunzo! The air gasket is blown and I get to drive “The BEAST” for now. I need a car – and I want another Cherokee. Yes, it doesn’t HAVE to be a Jeep, but I love them. They are easy drivers, fun drivers, 4wd (though there’s some 2wd in the area…which just baffles me by its uselessness), I’m familiar with them, AND it fits my lifestyle! I was beginning to wonder if I should just settle for a Honda Civic or something…but then a wise bird told me not to – I’m getting Posi next month and it would be hard to fit her in there!!! Good idea 🙂 So, I know the vehicle I want…but I want a certain year (97 or newer), I don’t want a Grand Cherokee (eww…), 150000 miles or less, not white (green, red, or blue preferred), and the ac needs to work! Not to mention..it needs blinkers. Do you know how annoying it at a 4 way stop to make a left with no blinkers? Very annoying. And Thor (aka “The Beast”) has a leak in power steering, which also gets very embarrassing. Especially when making a turn into the grocery store next to a cop telling a homeless man to stop pan-handling and a lady is trying to leave the parking lot. So, there can’t be a leak in the power steering. Oh, AND the doors need to open and shut right. AND no oil leaks. And, and, and…the list goes on. Oh, I don’t like leather. But i’m getting a dog, and leather will be easier to clean…hmmmph…

It’s a struggle not knowing what I will drive…if i will find a car soon. What kind of car it is…is it going to be my perfect car…or will i just settle for a piece of junk? I gotta hold on to His leading, have faith He has it all figured out.

2) As stated in one of my prior posts, Morgan and I (and hopefully Chloe’ and Taleah) are moving out next month. I’m hoping, oh how i am HOPING the Lord gives the go-ahead to Chloe’ and Taleah. It would be a house full of GFHS graduates and some of my closest friends/sisters. But if not…what will Morgan and I do? Where would I go? Will I be able to still take Posi? Will I make enough to pay rent? Again, there’s a cornucopia of worries! (MAN, i LOVE the word cornucopia!!! 🙂 )

I just gotta have faith He knows the perfect people and the perfect place for me to live. I’ve done what He told me to – now’s His turn to finish it.

3) I am SO very thankful the Lord blessed me with a father here on Earth who has always provided for me so greatly. My dad is an aerospace engineer, he LOVES planes…and know’s SO much about them! I remember when I was little, he’d take my sisters and I to air-shows to see the Blue Angel’s and other crazy planes..he’d explain each plane to us. My first time that I remember was around the age of 3 or 4, I hid under the seats of our Aerostar. It was SO loud! But cool! When I see a plane in the sky or the remnants of smoke, I think of my daddy.

It’s awesome…very, VERY awesome to have a dad who is passionate about what he does. I’m so proud of him for working SO hard all my life. But with his line of work…being laid off is sometimes imminent. He’s been all over the United States for work; Texas, Alabama, California, and Washington…he was even gonna go to Korea to work when I was in the 3rd grade. Thankfully, he didn’t end up going. 🙂

But at this point of time, my dad finds himself unemployed – and he HATES it. I know the Lord will provide him a job…but hearing him so bummed out makes me sad and makes me want the Lord to hurry up and answer this prayer. But it’s taking time – which prayers often do…it’s taking faith to know the Lord will provide a job for my dad.

 

You know, sometimes when a trial comes…I feel bad I don’t worry about it too much. Those 3 things above can give me an anxiety take if i let them! But you know…I won’t let it take my thoughts captive. I know Jesus will provide. I know there’s an answer. If I seem naive for not fretting over them too much…well, so be it. I’m not ignorant, I’m just not taking control of things I can’t control. He has it all figured out, I just gotta stand and let Him do what He WILL do. (p.s. this does not mean being LAZY!)

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